DevilsJim89 Posted December 11, 2004 Report Share Posted December 11, 2004 Alright now I dont usually post my life online but i just need to vent out here cuz y'all are my online fam on this board... ----- heres the story....in june this year, i started liking this girl who i worked with at Burger King at the time. She was goin out with my friend Mike for two weeks then he dumped her because they had nothing in common. So like 3 days later she starts liking me and a week later we are going out in july. Shes in 10th grade, im in 11th grade but our bdays only 3 months apart. the summer months and fall months go by and everything is great. we hung out alot and i really thought she was perfect. I loved everything about her and I loved her so much. Now shes only my 2nd girlfriend ever but she was the best. my other one a year in a half ago last 2 months. so this month, dec 1st to be exact, i walk with her in school like normal and i notice something is bothering her because she isnt talking like usual but she said shes "fine and nothing is wrong". So I think nothing of it cuz i figure ill ask her bout it when i got home after hockey. I get home and she IMs me saying we need to talk. we get on the phone and the first words are "jim....we need to breakup". She said shes just stressed out with alotta stuff and shes "not over her past". I ask her to elaborate and she just gives me the "its hard to explain, i dont know" crap. then a week later we talk about it some more and i find out that she still has feelings for her ex-boyfriend richie and they dated for a year on and off during 8th to 9th grade and she says he dumped her many times and hurt her by being dumped....so these past 10 days i have been really upset because i thought she was the one and i really loved her. plus shes been avoiding me in school cuz she "needs time to get over me". So now...i find out tonight she and richie are at the movies and i know their prolly hookin up and im just waiting for her to come online and ill read her profile that says something like "<33 richie 12.10.04" or along the lines of that. and if that does happen or they become a couple in the next few days, that proves shes a damn hipocrit because she says we "kinda rushed" since we went out like 10 days after my friend mike broke up with her. they were friends while we was goin out (robyn n richie) but i never suspected this. :bang: Now why the hell would she go back to someone who emotionally hurt her a few times? I dont freakin get that. What should I do? One half of me just wants to tell her off and forget her but the other half wants me to just be her friend as much as it kills me. its so hard to move on. damn 4 months and 2 weeks down the freakin drain...and just to think that the 17th woulda been 5 months! :bang: but damn! why'd YOU become such a bitch? ---and i never thought FP's "I Loved You" song would ever relate to me, thanks robyn for proving me wrong! :daedulus: :daedulus: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JumpinJack AJ Posted December 11, 2004 Report Share Posted December 11, 2004 I hate 2 say it, but there's a chance u are gonna run in2 stuff like this a few times in life. Not 2 knock anyone's dreams of finding that perfect person when u are young...but don't even say u think someone is "the one" until u are like 20-something. When i waz 18 i had a girl do similar things 2 me...execpt it lasted nearly a year. After are final break, i just surrounded myself in friends and realized just how good i had it. Of course shortly afterwards, she wanted me back but i never did go back. I eventually hooked up with another girl a few months later (even tho' a part of my young heart waz still with this other girl). It's funny, cuz this past summer (6 years after all that drama), we ran in2 each other at a bar where my friend's band plays. She of course waz all over me and trying 2 get back with me. I flirted a lil' but would never go back 2 her. We can always be friends. The girl i got with waz even worse than the one i just talked about. This girl waz very 'hood...very ghetto, which waz what i needed. I came up in a very 'hood upbringing and for that year or so, i had kinda gotten away from that. So this next girl waz very 'hood which waz just a very familiar thing 2 me. However, after about a year, she really screwed my life up in ways i won't dare imagin. I believe in giving people a 2nd chance even tho' that's very risky. Things eventually got better...but about a year after that, just when things finally felt perfect and i waz thinking about the next level, she messed up again. How would u feel throwing 3 years down the drain!!! My point is this, as much as u can fall 4 someone, never sell yourself out. U don't wanna come out of a relationship saying 2 yourself "man, i wish i would have done this when i waz with her." Never desided 2 NOT do something u wanna do 4 a girl (unless it's reasonable) cuz u could be missing some amazing things in life just 2 keep her happy. Whenever i've had a girl leave me or loose interest in me, i've never missed a beat. It might hurt, but i just keep movin' on, hanging out with other friends. Waiting around and being upset is just silly. If u wanna feel alot better about yourself, IM me and i'll tell u my biggest heartache of all. It's amazing how things can be perfect and next thing u know, a girl who u thought waz so respectable and flawless can pull some Jerry Springer type stuff 2 make your whole world crazy. This event is barely over a year old and i still think about this girl everyday...and let's just say she's living a lie and that ALOT of people in our circle of friends know it. Girls are crazy and lots of the time, they make stupid decisions when it comes 2 guys (no offense ladies). That's just the way it is. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Admin Hax Posted December 11, 2004 Admin Report Share Posted December 11, 2004 Alright now I dont usually post my life online but i just need to vent out here cuz y'all are my online fam on this board... ----- heres the story....in june this year, i started liking this girl who i worked with at Burger King at the time. She was goin out with my friend Mike for two weeks then he dumped her because they had nothing in common. So like 3 days later she starts liking me and a week later we are going out in july. Shes in 10th grade, im in 11th grade but our bdays only 3 months apart. the summer months and fall months go by and everything is great. we hung out alot and i really thought she was perfect. I loved everything about her and I loved her so much. Now shes only my 2nd girlfriend ever but she was the best. my other one a year in a half ago last 2 months. so this month, dec 1st to be exact, i walk with her in school like normal and i notice something is bothering her because she isnt talking like usual but she said shes "fine and nothing is wrong". So I think nothing of it cuz i figure ill ask her bout it when i got home after hockey. I get home and she IMs me saying we need to talk. we get on the phone and the first words are "jim....we need to breakup". She said shes just stressed out with alotta stuff and shes "not over her past". I ask her to elaborate and she just gives me the "its hard to explain, i dont know" crap. then a week later we talk about it some more and i find out that she still has feelings for her ex-boyfriend richie and they dated for a year on and off during 8th to 9th grade and she says he dumped her many times and hurt her by being dumped....so these past 10 days i have been really upset because i thought she was the one and i really loved her. plus shes been avoiding me in school cuz she "needs time to get over me". So now...i find out tonight she and richie are at the movies and i know their prolly hookin up and im just waiting for her to come online and ill read her profile that says something like "<33 richie 12.10.04" or along the lines of that. and if that does happen or they become a couple in the next few days, that proves shes a damn hipocrit because she says we "kinda rushed" since we went out like 10 days after my friend mike broke up with her. they were friends while we was goin out (robyn n richie) but i never suspected this. :bang: Now why the hell would she go back to someone who emotionally hurt her a few times? I dont freakin get that. What should I do? One half of me just wants to tell her off and forget her but the other half wants me to just be her friend as much as it kills me. its so hard to move on. damn 4 months and 2 weeks down the freakin drain...and just to think that the 17th woulda been 5 months! :bang: but damn! why'd YOU become such a bitch? ---and i never thought FP's "I Loved You" song would ever relate to me, thanks robyn for proving me wrong! :daedulus: :daedulus: ha oh man, Tim pointed out this post to me and I'll toss you a few points cause man I've been there waaaaay too many times. the first thing that jumps out at me is "I loved her so much"... err...well no you didn't, it's called an infatuation (infatuation n 1: foolish and usually extravagant passion or love or admiration 2: temporary love of an adolescent [syn: puppy love, calf love, crush] 3: an object of extravagant short-lived passion)...a few months and your age is hardly any grounds to love someone... next up is "Now shes only my 2nd girlfriend ever but she was the best." the best? so there's a 50/50 chance to that...you're either going to like her or hate her...most common odds are if this is the girl AFTER your first girlfriend then she's probably better, else you'd still be with the first girl...follow what I'm saying? when a girl says "fine and nothing is wrong" with a voice tone that's not normal then that's usually a sure sign the world is about to end... "She said shes just stressed out with alotta stuff and shes "not over her past"" this is the typical response from a girl that has no clue what she wants, and the "stressed out" crap is an easy way out. You can't really argue with it and she doesn't have to defend it...keep pushing her about it then it will start a fight, but wait it gets better...if it breaks into a fight she can say "see what I mean? I'm too stressed" it's almost like she wants it that way because then she won't feel guilty about ditching you because it's now justified...you stressed her out...crazy spin on things huh? "its hard to explain, i dont know" well duh...everything that you don't want to explain is hard to explain...it's like the "whatever" reply you get from a girl...it's not really whatever it's just that she has no idea what to say but still wants to get the last word in. "and i find out that she still has feelings for her ex-boyfriend richie" here's some simple advice...she'll have feelings for anyone who gives her attention and she will not think twice about finding more attention elsewhere...don't ever assume A girl is YOUR girl...she's only your's till she finds someone else. "they dated for a year on and off during 8th to 9th grade and she says he dumped her many times and hurt her by being dumped" this my friend is what we call DRAMA...girls can't live without it, this is the same kinda rule that applies to a girl who gets hit by her b/f all the time and she says with him, she has it locked in her head that she can change him or someday be good enough for him that's why she keeps going back...it's not a matter of being dumped over and over it's a challange and it has loads of drama. "so these past 10 days i have been really upset because i thought she was the one and i really loved her. " explain what you think love for her is...oh wait...you're already wrong...honestly "plus shes been avoiding me in school cuz she "needs time to get over me". she'll be right back on you and/or whoever else she can find once the other guy ditches her again...it's all about attention and getting it from whoever will give it. "So now...i find out tonight she and richie are at the movies and i know their prolly hookin up" ok simple DON'T WORRY ABOUT WHAT SHE'S DOING...it's not your problem "I'm just waiting for her to come online and ill read her profile that says something like "<33 richie 12.10.04" or along the lines of that." that is a perfect way for her to keep you in the loop because it's an indirect way of her getting attention...and she knows you'll read it... "if that does happen or they become a couple in the next few days" who cares?? this is not the only girl in the world "she says we "kinda rushed"" girls need attention...you have to rush these things :hilarious: "Now why the hell would she go back to someone who emotionally hurt her a few times?" see above, it's drama she has it in her head she can change him or be good enough for him...it's hardwired into her head weather she knows it or not. "What should I do?" simple, ignore her and move on with your life, nothing will get her back more than seeing you happy with someone else while she's still playing bounce around with guys and earns herself a slut reputation...and you don't want ANY part of that...trust me. "One half of me just wants to tell her off and forget her but the other half wants me to just be her friend " don't tell her off...just leave it alone and let it die....and DO NOT be her friend, keeping her around will only eat away at you...again trust me on that...and honestly after what she did to you what good of a friend is she? you just seem to have an attachment problem...you'll grow out of it before you know it though. "damn 4 months and 2 weeks down the freakin drain...and just to think that the 17th woulda been 5 months!" 5 months is nothing, it's not even enough time to decide if you have reasonable feelings for someone or not...and trying to make goals out of dates only makes the actual time spent together less valuable. "but damn! why'd YOU become such a bitch?" welcome to life, that's what girls do. Don't take any of the above personal...I'm just not going to sugarcoat things and tell you "oh that was the way it's meant to be bla bla bla" there it is in plain text take it for what it's worth. Tim can vouch for the fact that I know how girls work, took years to finally figure out how they think and now I can damn near read them like a book now. But for real leave girls alone, enjoy being young, go out have some fun, date girls just don't get serious till you've spent some time on that person and you get to see the real them. People in high school and even middle school are so quick to try and grow up they step right over the fun parts of being in school and having a good time before the real world gets you. If you go out with a girl you shouldn't be in love the next day...or even the next month for that matter. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jazzy Julie Posted December 11, 2004 Report Share Posted December 11, 2004 ok from a girls point of view, i dont understand y girls go back to idiots, ive never done that myself so i dont understand y she has done this, but if she does have feelings for him, her heart must have taken over instead of her head. See we get really emotional and all rational thought goes and we make bad decisions. But this other guy will more than likely hurt her again, and guess who she will go crying to. Probably you. It depends how u feel about her if this does happen, if she gets hurt and you are there for her, she will love you for that. But to be honest i wouldnt advise taking her back, if after about 5 months she cant get this guy out of her head, she is still gonna be thinking about him. Hope this helps at all but im not exactly the relationship queen. good luck with it all tho, things like this just teach u things and get u closer to your true love. :thumb: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DevilsJim89 Posted December 11, 2004 Author Report Share Posted December 11, 2004 Yo! thank you so much guys! thank God i play varsity ice hockey and that and my friends are helpin me move on. All your advice is great! Yeah Hax, you could definatly write a book! haha Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JumpinJack AJ Posted December 11, 2004 Report Share Posted December 11, 2004 Yeah, Hax droppin' knowledge. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Silver Tiger Posted December 11, 2004 Report Share Posted December 11, 2004 Yeah, you'll be fine. It's these high school relationships. You'll look back on her and be grateful that you didn't stay in a relationship with a girl who only has a boyfriend to have a boyfriend. God Blessa! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bigted Posted December 13, 2004 Report Share Posted December 13, 2004 One day you'll find the one for u, it's better to be friends with a girl for a while and get to know if u really do like her or not, don't trip if things don't work out, just be honest and you'll find love, don't rush anything. :ditto: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Candice Posted January 5, 2005 Report Share Posted January 5, 2005 :nhawong: i'm a chick.... that guy was a fool.. and needs a couple of years and a couple more girlfriends untill he can really get a good judgement of women.... it sounds to me like your a little vunerable, and need a friend.... well i'm not one.. har har har Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Admin Hax Posted January 5, 2005 Admin Report Share Posted January 5, 2005 :nhawong: i'm a chick.... that guy was a fool.. and needs a couple of years and a couple more girlfriends untill he can really get a good judgement of women.... it sounds to me like your a little vunerable, and need a friend.... well i'm not one.. har har har I had nothing to do with this...I swear :cya: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mfuqua23 Posted January 6, 2005 Report Share Posted January 6, 2005 Hax, please don't go on a loop hole on us. If u do, it's the end of the JJFP website. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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