Members willsmithfan1 Posted August 8, 2005 Members Report Share Posted August 8, 2005 (edited) I wrote two verses yesterday, my first verse didnt go well so I started again. The 2nd verse was done yesterday and I didn't change anything. Let me know what you think, advice is always appreciated... At It Again My lyrics are goin down underground Hear dope beats lyrics and sounds I'll turn all haters to one scene Firing back at U as strong as gasoline U heard I stopped rapping for a while Makin s*** just ain't my style Bass runnin through my speakers Another underrated MC bleeder I dont need anybody, I make it on my own Other motherf***ers been doin their s*** all wrong F***ed up lyrics with beats callin them songs My rhymes are hitting as strong as steel Mix my lyrics with beats, too strong to kill 'If you still don't like my flow F*** off and I suggest you go Hot beats with lyrics so cold None of this s*** will get old Never forget the way the story is told I keep my s*** loud Even haters know how I keep it down' You don't have a line to rhyme with 'told' I keep my s*** loud Even haters know how I keep it down My lyrics are like rocks and stones Lines so heavy, it can break your bones Took time with and now it's all blown You'll see me in future ruling the throne You act like you hold the reign I'll give you lil something that can pop your veins My lines are hittin so hard Already got people treatin me like God Like the words that I'm spittin Nobody tells I'm quittin All of it turned out so deep Crazy lyrics that never put you to sleep Other people and music selling cheap Cuz they cheat They can't bring the heat with hot beats U hear my stuff in the middle of streets I'm takin it back to youth Never lie, always have to speak the truth Read my words line by line Outstanding stuff that always shines Written in two thousand and five Got the lyrics that keep you alive Edited August 9, 2005 by willsmithfan1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kbfprince Posted August 8, 2005 Report Share Posted August 8, 2005 Nice, like I said before. But was 'You don't have a line to rhyme with 'told' intentional? Is it a part of the song? Liked the 2nd verse more, it had considerably less curse words. Good start. :dope: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fresh-Ta-Def Posted August 8, 2005 Report Share Posted August 8, 2005 its ok man keep working on it your off to a great start Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PeaceAngel Posted August 8, 2005 Report Share Posted August 8, 2005 I'm not really up for the cursing but if that's your style then keep doing your thing. I thought it was really good! :dope: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mike Posted August 8, 2005 Report Share Posted August 8, 2005 its ok man keep working on it your off to a great start ← shes a girl Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mfuqua23 Posted August 8, 2005 Report Share Posted August 8, 2005 It was very... bragadocious. "I keep my s*** loud Even haters know how I keep it down" - I really didn't think this made much sense. "My lyrics are like rocks and stones Lines so deep it can break your bones" - if your gonna use a simile or metaphor, keep it together. It would make more sense to say "Lines so heavy, it can break your bones" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members willsmithfan1 Posted August 9, 2005 Author Members Report Share Posted August 9, 2005 Thanks for the feedback. Any lines I can change let me know. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Loco Posted August 9, 2005 Report Share Posted August 9, 2005 Holla, look at fuq reply. you gotta keep your **** the best, so work on it. Check out my new track fairy tails Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.