LOVE

[JumpinJack AJ]

This is one of those crazy topics. I know a few people here don't like 2 get 2 personal, which is cool. But we all know that love makes the world go 'round. So this topic is 4 those who wanna share their experiences, lessons, opinions, and stories all about love. I've had a crazy last 2 years of my life and i'm finally at a very free and open place in life right now. So i'm just gonna put it out there 4 y'all (the good, the bad, and the ugly). I'm sure a few of u have some stuff u can share. I know 3Cookies dose...ha ha.

Hold on y'all...this could be a bumpy ride.

1997 - 1998 - I'm 17/18 and i'm a senior in high skool. Of course i had other "girlfriends," but about 18 is where things start getting very real...so this is where i'm starting from. I started seriously talking 2 this girl that i had known since we were 12. With us being 18 and it being our senior year, it seems like alot of things were falling in2 place. This girl had liked me for the past few years and i waz finally at a place where i waz interested. As i came around, her interested decreased a lil.' I had 2 play games for 5 months or so, but then we finally started going out. However, after a few months, i started hearing how she waz trying 2 talk 2 another guy...which really stung. Then in May, we went 2 prom. The night waz kinda average but it seemed like things were turning around 4 the better. However, 2 days later, she just dumped me outta no where, which waz also 2 days b4 my 18th b-day. I waz devistated. We remained friends but their waz tons of tension. We were still in high skool so it waz a very public thing. She did something that really upset me and i called her out on it. We stopped talking the week of our graduation. There we were, friends of 7 years, and here we are not speaking at graduation. It waz awful. Summer started and i met another girl (which is the one i'm talking about in the next paragraph). At about the same time, my ex started calling again, apologizing and everything. There waz hope 4 us but i stayed focused on the new girl. When fall came around, she took a college class just 2 be around me, and she out of jealousy, she started seeing another guy 2 get back at me. She stayed with that guy for like 4 or 5 years. That guys waz crazy and she wazn't allowed 2 have a life. Me and her still talk from time 2 time, but she hasn't changed 4 the better, and even tho' we kissed a few months ago, i just KNEW once and 4 all 2 leave it alone. But at least we are still cool after all we had been thru.' But from that relationship, i kinda had this attitude that u can't trust anyone and that u can't rearrange your life 4 somebody cuz they can play u 4 the longest time without u knowing it.

1998 - 2000

I met this new girl. After seeing this preppy rich girl 4 so long, i felt like i needed 2 go back home. So i got a ghetto girl. She appreciated where i waz coming from and thought i waz the greatest thing ever. This girl had a kid (something i thought i'd never try). He waz just turning 2 around the time. Things were great at 1st. However, after awhile, i started seeing how jealous she waz of my friends that were girls. She would get so mad about nothing. She occasionally talked 2 her ex's, which waz cool with me...reguardless of the trust issues i had from the past relationship. In the winter of 1999/2000, this girl turned my life upside down. We went thru' this awful ordeal where she didn't believe i word i said and believed every single word her ex waz telling her...and that guy waz some whitetrash guy who lived a nasty lifestyle. Anyways, i didn't think all this waz that big of a deal, but one January day, the drama go so crazy, she called me and said "would u hate me if i slept with ________." First off, who actually says that?! Anyways, my heart waz shattered, i couldn't believe things went down that way. Needless 2 say i broke up with her on the phone right there. However, with her kid in mind, i stuck around. Things kinda stayed the same, as if we didn't break up. I told her "I'ma do whatever i do, and if things fall in2 place, we'll give it another try." I thru' myself in2 my work. I did as many shows as i could. I neglected her really bad. As winter 2000 rolled around, i started wanting 2 take her back. At the same time, she got fed up with my being around then not being around. So she started talking 2 another guy. I found all of this out the hard way. This lead 2 alot of lies, fights, and nearly a few physical fights. Keep in mind i waz 'hood mode at the time. I waz ready 2 throw down with this new guy. Eventually, i got so fed up with her, i boldly let her know i waz done with her the day after Christmas. I got in2 a fight with her on the phone, and as her and her co-workers were walking our the front door, i rolled in2 the parking lot (the timing couldn't have been better), i had LL Cool J "Back Where I Belong" blasting, and threw all of her stuff out the window and all over her car. They all just stood there like "oh lawd, what's gonna happen next?" I peeled out of the parking lot, and from that moment on, life got better, even tho' it hurt. She isn't the kinda ex that u can talk 2 afterwards. She never called or anything. However, when i heard she got surgery back in 2001, i showed up at her place with all kinds of stuff 4 her and her son. She just recently had a new baby and is going 2 be married. While i dont' know how she has changed, i believe she is where she is supposed 2 be in life and i'm very happy 4 her. I ran in2 her about 4 months ago, and even tho' it would never work out, it waz amazing how that magic between us kinda sparked up again. From this relationship, i just had a more bitter look at trust and realized that if someone can't trust u for no reason, then they cant' be trusted. It also showed me how neglect can go on 4 so long, then outta no where, the female can snap and there's nothing u can do 2 fix it. I also learned that u gotta learn when 2 walk away, cuz when she cheated on me, i still stuck around and missed out on alot of oppertunities in love.

2000 - 2004

As things fell apart with the girl above, i met who i honestly believe is the most beautiful girl in the world. This girl waz flawless. Her supermodel looks are what got my attention, but it waz her angelic personality that i fell in love with. U simply can't find 2 many girls like this one. She waz so pure, so innocent, so nice, caring, etc. Both of us were just out of relationships, so she felt we shouldn't concentrate on getting 2gether. I stuck around and put in work about 9 months and finally, we were officially 2gether. I can't express how perfect things were. However, fast forward a few years. It's now 2003. I'm still acting with a kinda crappy job, in debt, and just comfortable in a lifestyle that really needed 2 be reworked. She just graduated from college and got her full time job which waz her career. She waz always about "the future" which i just didn't care about. Things started getting dry and i waz 2 stupid 2 see that it waz up 2 me 2 fix. At this same time, myself and a friend got casted in a rock and roll music review show. We had known each other for over a year and always had some chemistry between us. Now we were playing leads oppisite of each other....which lots of kissing scenes. My girlfriend waz working all the time and i waz spending time with this other girl who had a fiance serving in Iraq. Talk about a Jerry Springer episode in the works. As time when one, my girlfriend nagged and this other girl's fiance waz constantly reminding her thru' letters and phone calls that she just didn't wanna be with him. Our kisses and chemistry just led 2 a serious relationship...which started just emotionally, but led 2 more. Me and my girl are suffering and this other girl's fiance comes home. We were doing 2 shows and 2 different theaters 2gether, so all of our friends and co-stars know "something" waz going on, but could never see anything happening. Outta nowhere, this other girl, who wanted 2 be with me just turned away and said she waz marrying her boyfriend. I waz heartbroken and so confused. I wanted 2 play it cool and see where my heart led me but she just made that decision (from what i just recently heard waz basically a threat). I re-grouped my head and told my girl, who know "something" waz going on that i needed some space and that i didn't feel i could treat her the way she deserved 2 be treated...but we didn't break up. For about a year, i struggled with the girl i lost and how awful i felt about how i treated my girlfriend. I waz 24 and just so confused and beaten down by everything in life. Debt, love, career, skool, etc. A year after all the craziness. Me and my girlfriend had some serious talks, putting alot of things out there. I knew i waz hurting her and that now i could be the person i needed 2 be 2 sweep her off her feet and marry her. I wrote her this crazy letter and bought her this super expensive necklace 4 Christamas. When she opened it, her reaction waz less than what i expected, which killed me. 2 days later, she said we needed some space, which i respected. Next thing u know, she didn't answer her phone and her behavior changed. I did everything i could 2 get her back but it never worked. That's when i hit rock bottom.

Since December, i looked at how my life spun outta control and that i wazn't the person i wanted 2 be. I desided that if i waz gonna be a champion, then i gotta live like one. I started working out, getting in shape, i got my career and money situation right, spiritually i'm stronger than ever, and my attitude on life and love has changed. Without all that mess, i'd never get over my heartaches of the past and move on 2 a better place in life.

Since then, i finally got a taste of the single life. I don't need someone else 2 make me whole and i'm totally comfortable being by myself. I'd still give the world 2 get back my ex, but i'm open 2 what God has in store 4 me. I've tried talking 2 someone new, but my heart wouldn't let me go any further than that 1st kiss. Now i have 2 other friends who i could see things working out with, but lil' things keep getting in the way. So who knows what's next 4 me. Now i know what it takes 2 make a relationship work. U gotta give 100 percent all the time, cuz u never know when that other person dosen't wanna give their 50. U gotta pretend that your heart waz never hurt b4, cuz u can't punish the new person in your life 4 things the last person did. U gotta approach every day with an attitude that u are gonna do whatever it takes 2 make that person happy. U can't go 2 bed angry, cuz starting a new day with a bitter heart is a dangerous thing. I now know what it takes 2 be special enuff 2 be a part of my life that way, and when 2 stop something when it isn't on that level.

Wow, now that's a freakin' long post...ha ha. I can't wait 2 hear what some of u have 2 share.

[Fresh-Ta-Def]

all i can say is DAMN haha that was a essay on love from the man jumpin lol

ok well im only 14 turnin 15 in december 24 so right now i haven't really taken anything seriously... except 1 girl but ill tell the others aswell... heres 1 story all the others ill leave for a bit later my fingers are gonna hurt typeing this up haha...

ok well i was talkin with some friends and i had just got msn... asking for e-mails and stuff right.. i got this one girl Natalie she was pretty beautiful, hot and what not.. lol.. so i stared talking to her for a while.. we started chyllin and stuff we was downtown at the hiphop study place near our pizza shop and she wanted to go in so we did we noticed some friends from school and we chylled with them and we were freestyling and stuff.. 10 min sumthing later i went to the bathroom and my homie chace was like "yoh ask that mami out now, she fly..." or what ever its hard to remember excatly.. and i was all like well she barly knows me G.. and hes like do it ya fag.. so when i went out they were still freestyling so i jumped in and started rapping i looked back at chace and hes giving me that look like "do it or you gay" sort of thing so i started rapping about her and stuff then at the end i said something like

"hand in hand..... and its late now//

and i love you baby common maby we can go out.../"

something like that like i said can't remember excatly.. and she kind of blushed and stuff and said yes i looked back at chace and he gave me a thumbs up i was like all confused because i didnt know her that long.. well then time passed you know kissin and hugin bull.... da da... da... then i started talkin to her friend about a moths later and i get really into it... we become so close.. i go to the mall with some friends a while after and natalie comes to me and shes like baby i've been hearing things and i want the truth all mad and stuff and her friend sonia piped up shes like do you like natalie or not? i answered yes.. shes liek then why the hell you trippin and talkin to mel like you to in love and all that.. and ok well to make a long story short i ended up cheating on her and she got really pissed when she found out almost killed me because it was her best friend well what i learned from this is ......

TREAT GIRLS LIKE A HUMAN BEING BE WHO YOU ARE NOT WHAT YOU SEE IF THEY DONT LOVE YOU FOR THAT THEN IT AINT THERE AT ALL... GIRLS AINT THERE TO BE A TOY YOU THROW AROUND AND TELL WHAT TO DO... AND HIDE FROM YUOR FRIEND YOU SHOULD BE EMBARASSED ABOUT THINGS.. ALSO IF THE GIRL WANTS TO TALK TO GUYS LET HER DONT BE SO UPTIGHT BECAUSE IF SHE LOVES YOU SHE AINT GOING TO LEAVE SO CLAM YOURSELF OR AS WILL WOULD SAY "PUMP YA BRAKES"!!!! :rockon:

Edited August 9, 2005 by Fresh-Ta-Def

[Bracesup]

Wow Adam James, you're a slut. :lolsign:

[cristigolo]

maby y'all can help me get a girll i really like.

i think she likes me too but she says that it is just as a friend. i do not think so becuz she started messaging all of a sudden and we send like 20 messages a night. about movies and all that stuff. that is why i think she likes me. pls gimme some advice.

P.S:girl advices are really aprciated

[JumpinJack AJ]

Bracesup just called me a slut. :whatthelerkot:

Hey, i'm not justifying my situation, but it really wasn't about me just getting involved with another girl. If i really got in2 it, it would take up about 5 pages worth of this post and nobody wants 2 read about that. And it's 2 years old, i'm past it and not trying 2 really go back there.

cristigolo, my best advice is just 2 play it cool. If u like her, just be a really good friend. If u go out of your way 2 be with her, u might make her uncomfortable which'll mess things up. If she starts talking 2 someone else, it's cool 2 be hurt, but don't act mad or jealous. U never know if she'll quickly find out it's not meant 2 be, and u might be the friend she crys 2 and finds out u are the person she likes. Since she has straight up said she just wants 2 be friends, u don't wanna step on that.

Right now i'm totally comfortable with being single...but there is 2 girls i really like. One of them i've known for 4 years but our friendship has stayed very new cuz we aren't really close. I definitly wouldn't mind if she wanted 2 get 2gether, but since that dosen't seem 2 be something she's thinking about right now, i'm just happy 2 be friends with her.

I've actually gotten really close 2 the other girl. She spent months saying how she waz interested, but now that i'm actually kinda ready 2 start seeing someone, she no longer interested. In fact, she's talking 2 somebody else. So i'm a bit confused but i'm just keeping things cool. However, this girl dosen't generate the magic she used 2.

[KevTastic]

Better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all AJ. I know that quote sounds harsh but just try and remember the good times and be thankful it happened at all.

I currently have never been in love with someone. Sure i've thought i was but to be honest im only 21 now and have been growing up still up until now.

I've never had a long lasting relationship. There is one girl who i am close with now who i have strong feelings for but we are good friends and i don't want to ruin that for anything and i am quite happy the way things are between us anyway. I can't say im in love with her because im not sure exactly what that is yet. I'll keep you posted :eusa_snooty:

[FreshPrincess]

wow, now this is an interesting topic.

ok, i'm gonna keep it brief just because at the mo we're not really on good terms so i can't really bothered to talk about him, but i'll fill you all in some other time.

2001 - I'm 16 and have just got a saturday job as a cashier in a supermarket. Before i know it i've got some 23 year old saying how much he likes me and how he wants to take me out. So i said i'd like to get to get to know him first. I know this is gonna sound really cheesy coz a lot of girls say it but i really do look for personality in a guy, and i need to be able to talk to someone and feel comfortable doing so. Anyway it turned out that we got on really well so we started seeing each other. Although we did have to overcome a lot of issues (one of them being the fact that he was shorter than me...god dammit i hate being tall!) i suppose most of our time together was cool. But in March of this year, after being together for 3 years, we both decided that we wanted different things so we split up. Obviously this is very condensed but as i said i'll fill y'all in at some point!

Oh yeah and to top it all off he now wants to get back together with me...but i don't.

Anywayz so recently i've been chatting this guy at work. He's a really nice guy and we really get on and everything was going great until we were both on a break talking and we happened to reveal to each other how old we both are. I thought he was about 26/7, which would have been fine, and he thought i was abouth 25, which also would have been fine. But it turns out he's 36!! that's right..36!!!!!! Why can't life be simple??!! So the other day he says that he likes me and thinks we should go out for a drink but i don't know. Although i like him i'm not really sure how it could work.

Advice please people!!!

[Bracesup]

I'm 16 and have just got a saturday job as a cashier in a supermarket. Before i know it i've got some 23 year old saying how much he likes me and how he wants to take me out.

But it turns out he's 36!! that's right..36!!!!!! So the other day he says that he likes me and thinks we should go out for a drink

←

Isn't this wrong? :ponder:

[FreshPrincess]

I'm 16 and have just got a saturday job as a cashier in a supermarket. Before i know it i've got some 23 year old saying how much he likes me and how he wants to take me out.

But it turns out he's 36!! that's right..36!!!!!! So the other day he says that he likes me and thinks we should go out for a drink

←

Isn't this wrong? :ponder:

←

what d'ya mean?

[Bracesup]

Meaning I'm 22 and the thought of dating a 16 year old girl is totally absurd. And even when I turn 36, I can't imagine myself hitting on a 20 year old girl. Gross!

I'm sorry Michelle, maybe I'm just old fashioned. :thatspdiddybad:

[FreshPrincess]

Meaning I'm 22 and the thought of dating a 16 year old girl is totally absurd. And even when I turn 36, I can't imagine myself hitting on a 20 year old girl. Gross!

I'm sorry Michelle, maybe I'm just old fashioned. :thatspdiddybad:

←

oh ok i get what you mean. no need to apologise. You've gotta understand tho that each time they've thought i was older and then have been unable to deny their feelings for me :lolsign:

[fresh_from_sofia]

I'm 16 and have just got a saturday job as a cashier in a supermarket. Before i know it i've got some 23 year old saying how much he likes me and how he wants to take me out.

But it turns out he's 36!! that's right..36!!!!!! So the other day he says that he likes me and thinks we should go out for a drink

←

Isn't this wrong? :ponder:

←

what d'ya mean?

←

in my country this people going in jail ,before that we just :daveuidiot: and then to jail :1-say-yes:

[Bracesup]

in my country this people going in jail ,before that we just :daveuidiot:  and then to jail :1-say-yes:

←

The "before that we just :daveuidiot: " line made me laugh so much that I almost fell down. :lolsign: :lolsign: :lolsign: :lolsign: :lolsign:

[WesSyde]

yeah age is nothin but a number, but i think when ur still young u should search 4 more options b4 going after a guy that's like 15 years older than u. my dad is 6 years older than my mom, and he met her when she was like 18 or 19 and they get along great, so it can work. however, i think when ur young and 16 years old u shouldn't be messing around with guys that are 23 cuz u know they're only after one thing. when u get to be an adult, u can start making more choice tho cuz ur more mature. i guess if u really like this 36 year old guy, it's your choice but i wouldn't do it. 15 years is a big difference. there will probably be lots of things that get in the way. what u should try 2 do is make it clear 2 the guy what u do and don't want. if u wanna go out 4 a drink that's cool as long as u tell him u aren't interested if u really aren't. i think women sometimes don't understand how truly guys get confused becuz they don't know know what girls want. so make it clear but it's ur choice. like Bracesup said, maybe i'm just old fashioned, but if i was a 36 year old guy i probably wouldn't try to hit on 21 year old girls. ultimately it's ur decision. i'm only 16 and i don't have much experience, maybe other people can give u tips 2. i just think ur still young enough to see what else is out there first b4 u start seein this guy. now what i mean?

[Jazzy Julie]

well to take a line from the rembrants from friends, my love life is DOA. I dont know why, ive been single for a long time and i wish i knew why bcoz i would fix it. As far as i can tell im not ugly, im not a horrible person, i wouldnt mess a lad around coz i wouldnt even dream about 2 timing.

Ive only had minor relationships and the guys turn out to be losers.

Im not sure if the reason is bcoz im not slutty, im not a one night stand kinda girl. I see girls in the club and u can tell what they would do if a lad wanted it, well im not like that and guys can tell. My mum has even told my friends to find me a boyfriend when we go out lol.

k this topic makes me look like a loser. My problem now is im becoming even more independant, i have my own job with my own money. I bought my car, i do everything for myself, so i dont know if i would make a man feel like he's usless.

Notice how none of us has anything nice to say in this topic. Talk about throwing salt in your wounds.